Monday, August 28, 2017

Why I smashed the wall in on Friday

Why did I smash in that wall on Friday? That I still question.

I was going through a pretty normal day, the bike ride was absolute murder, my legs were aching, I was still dazed from sleeping. But, along the way, I did overhear some people talking about Trump, and it kinda got mixed in with some other thoughts, like the possibility of a world war 3. That was when I started considering more about how terrible the world is becoming. If this were to be compared to some movie called "They Live", I would be that drifter with the glasses, and the government might as well be the aliens. The rest of the day I'd call somewhat normal. We didn't exactly have any actual things to be learning, just digital zombies, bullying, stuff like that. I recall at one point we did have a code red drill, but it was the same stuff. By the time I went home, that was when I finally lost it. I got mad at the fact the world would be turning to hell, the fact everyone in the world is an inferior entity compared to me when it comes to gullibility, or how I might as well be a god. AND HOW IDIOTIC AND USELESS BELIEVING IN NON VIOLENCE IS!  In my anger, I had slammed a door really hard and broke a huge hole in the wall. I suddenly went out of my "angry state" and tried to find whatever I could to patch up that hole in the wall. Suddenly, I came across a poster I had on the wall covering up a different hole I put in. I tried to spend the rest of the day reflecting on my outburst and didn't feel like telling my parents because they'd find out soon enough. When my tutor came over, I started ranting about all that stuff I was mad about and didn't get much done with him. When my parents came over, they asked about the hole I had caused, and I admitted all the rational things, such as how I believed non violence was idiotic. My parents started to come to a better understanding and told me how I could manage my anger next time. I have however, been ever more focused on discussing my struggles with my therapist.

Friday, August 25, 2017

Pacifism

Pacifism is weak pacifism is deceptive pacifism is a road to drugs pacifism is for weaklings pacifism is a religion of the weak. Pacifism is for vegetarians. What has pacifism ever done that has benefitted this world?